Ires & Ears & Reader Satisfaction Survey

Instructions: Read each row left to right, then, in each empty cell in the first column, insert a word that irks you. In the corresponding empty cell in the far right column, insert your irky word’s opposite. If you can’t think of a word that irks you, insert a word that feels good to your…

The Lavish Land

“April is the cruelest month,” Eliot told Pound all about it, Easter tide out, but why brood on our days unless we are made of dry wood and worry, each ring a memory of rain? Does any month feel pity? You called her a primrose, your spiral spring shell. The land tired of playing possum…

Notes on “Big Cactus,” a Novel by Sylvia Wilkinson

In his third essay in Anatomy of Criticism, “Theory of Myths,” Northrop Frye places irony and satire in the “Mythos of Winter”: As structure, the central principle of ironic myth is best approached as a parody of romance: the application of romantic mythical forms to a more realistic content which fits them in unexpected ways….

Mkgnao!9: Alien Cats from Outer Space (A Minidrama)

Abducted by alien cats from outer space and whisked away to a faraway planet then shot back to Earth from a circus cannon cocked with physicist rubber string theory, a cat cannonball, Scamble tries to interest Cramble in a tabloid worthy extraterrestrial tale! Cramble: [Silence] Scamble: “And you have nothing to say?!” Cramble: “Does this…

“Therapy”: A Kierkegaardian Sitcom

Tubby is into therapy. On any given day, he might drop by his aroma therapist and get a concoction of essential oils rubdown while inhaling infusions of lavender and such to improve, for example, his virility. Or Tubby will go in for a bit of acupuncture. One of his problems is with a knee.[1] Or…

On Discussion

What is there to discuss-ion? “Music as discourse (jazz) doesn’t work,” John Cage said.* “If you’re going to have a discussion, have it and use words.” As both a jazz and Cage fan, I’ve often reflected on the paradox, for discourse, “running to and fro,” seems an accurate description of jazz, with or without words….

Favorite Recipes from “An Eminent Poets’ Cookbook”

Expecting a hungry poet to visit for a few days, and worried what you’ll dish up? Here are a few tasty recipe suggestions, taken from the venerable An Eminent Poets’ Cookbook “Ezra Pound Scrambled Eggs and Pine Nut Casserole” Go to a dark wood and collect a cup of pine nuts. Soak in vinegar. Secure…

The Audience

The audience appeared waving umbrellas from drinking happy hour beer, or hurrying from work or dropping off the kid, driving in from the aloof burb or sliding down from the hep pad on the hill, making a splash, alighting from cab or bus amid the rush. Coming from everywhere, the audience began to cohere. The…

The Tooth, the Whole Tooth, and Nothing but the Tooth

The tooth was an expert, a specialist. He knew one thing, inside and out, and kept to his own. He seemed happy with his place, his lot, but he could be very exacting. He took peer review extremely seriously. He didn’t like being pushed around. He met his opponent squarely. He was polished; he was…

Your Poem Will Start in 21 Seconds

Your poem will start in 21 seconds. You can skip this ad in 5 seconds. Or now: click away. Or watch video: A two-tone building, seen from the street, light lime green with aqua-mint green trim over sunned-pink, with red double lamppost, a scotch of blue sky, a wedge of blue, a swizzle of blue….

Selections from Foulings Phonebook

Selections from Phonebook for Foulings Neighborhood of SE Portland: 1: Foulings Tavern: 33 Foulings Street, Eastgate-3218. 2: Jack Foulings, 33 Foulings Street, Eastgate-3218. 3: Foulings Car Repair Shop: 20 Third Ave. No phone. 4: Foulings Music: LP Specialists. Fourth and Foulings. 5: Foulings Grocery: Corner of Foulings and Third. 6: Flowers by Joyce: Sidewalk outside…